Abdominoplasty

This post is difficult to write. Well, not so much difficult to write, but difficult to publish. On June 1st I’m having abdominoplasty, or a tummy tuck. I hate the term tummy tuck so from here out I won’t be using it again, okay? A little background for any new readers:

Almost 9 years ago I had twins. But before those twins were surgically removed from my body, they decided to wreck things up a bit, leaving me with a large separation in my abdominal wall (diastasis recti), a semi-detached belly button and lots of extra skin because they were extra thoughtful. Fine. I never expected my body to return to its pre-pregnancy state.

And while I can’t pretend I didn’t fantasize about it, surgery just didn’t seem like a realistic solution. So I bought an insane amount of binders, corsets and compression garments. I bought books and downloaded videos and signed up for online coaching from women who all made it very clear that in some situations, none of this will work. I still tried. Nothing changed.

Five years later came baby #3 and, surprisingly, this pregnancy made things neither better nor worse in the beginning. But two years ago, I noticed a small lump just above my navel. I didn’t think much of it until my doctor noticed it during a routine exam and confirmed that it was a hernia. About a year later it had grown large enough that he felt it was best to surgically repair it. The problem with repairing  just the hernia is that I’m still left with the problem that caused it – the diastasis recti. And the only way to address both issues is the abdominoplasty procedure.

Even still, I struggled with the decision because 1) it isn’t covered by insurance which means several thousand dollars out of pocket and 2) I couldn’t get past the vanity issue. I’ve never felt like a vain person but this definitely seemed real high up there on the list of S%#t Vain People Do. I’m not sure what finally made me say out loud “I’m doing this,” but it came down to the fact that part of my body is broken and I’m fortunate enough to have the time and resources to fix it. I’ve been researching for months and sort of getting a feel for how people react to the idea – some family and close friends, some just random strangers in line at Target. The questions and comments have been all over the place. But 100% of these folks were 100% convinced that underneath my shirt sat smooth washboard abs.

This is a flip between what I look like to everyone all day (as I’m either contracting or wearing a corset of some type) and what my sweet husband gets to see at home. No, I am not poking it out. In fact, it’s probably not even fully relaxed because my body has forgotten how to do that. And no, it is not fat. It’s all my insides trying to escape through the gap in my gut. Fun fun.

P says my belly looks like an elephant. P is so sweet.

The hernia is above (what was at some point) my belly button.

So those questions and comments, I’m going to address some of them here because you probably have the same ones.

1. Who will perform the surgery and how did you find them? Dr. Christopher Patronella. I chose him after narrowing my choices down to three doctors. I chose those three doctors after staying up all night for weeks researching. I asked people I knew who’d had cosmetic surgery. I asked strangers from forums who’d had cosmetic surgery. I asked strangers on the street who looked like they may have had cosmetic surgery. It was bad. What I loved about Dr. P was his technique that gives a naturally contoured tummy instead of a flat-as-a-board look. After I was 95% sure he was the one, I found out that a friend used him as well and had amazing things to say about him. During our consult he said he would not perform lipo (lipo is pretty standard with this procedure) and he recommended outpatient because having only one procedure and no lipo should make for an easier recovery. This assured me that he wasn’t money hungry. We left feeling confident and booked the date on our way out.
2. How do they do it? An incision is made from hip to hip just below the pubic hairline. The separated muscles are stitched back together. The skin is pulled down. A new belly button is created. And the excess skin is removed.
3. Aren’t you afraid of the pain? In short, no. I’ve had two c-sections and 2 cervical surgeries which I’ve heard are not as intense as abdominoplasty. So I’m expecting the worst pain I’ve ever felt. But my doctor injects a pain-blocker called Exparel into the muscles (after he’s sewn them back together) that is proven to greatly diminish the pain.
4. You know that’s how Kanye’s mother died, right? (Yes. Someone actually asked me this.) Kanye’s mother didn’t die from a tummy tuck.
5. How long is the recovery? From what I hear, the first 3 or 4 days are pretty brutal. Doctors release you back to work after 2 weeks and you can usually resume all other activity including strength training at the 6 week mark. Fortunately husband works from home and has a very flexible schedule. My parents are around the corner to help and my mother-in-law volunteered to come down and help out as well. After July, his schedule will be a bit tighter so this was the perfect time to do it.
6. Why don’t you get the full Mommy Makeover (abdominoplasty, breast augmentation/lift, lipo)? While American standards say I’m a prime candidate for the breast augmentation, it’s not something I’ve ever wanted to do. My breasts aren’t broken – they ain’t pretty – but they’ve served their purpose and they did a damned good job of it.

I’m choosing to share for a couple of reasons. For one, I’ve kept my wrinkly little secret hidden under my shirt for almost a decade and I don’t want to trade one secret for another. Also, reading women’s journeys – from toying with the idea through 6 months post-op – has really been of help to me. I guess it’s sort of normalized it and helped me get past that nagging feeling that I was being selfish for doing this. If I can do that for someone else, it would make me happy.

So two weeks to go. I’m nervous. I’m excited. I’m bracing myself for great discomfort. I’m daydreaming about being able to hold plank and do arm balances that my core will not allow me to do. I’m grateful that my husband set aside the necessary funds years ago in case I ever decided to do this. I’m thankful for his full support of my decision*. I’m feeling a lot I guess.

I plan to do updates during the days and weeks following the surgery. If you’ve had this procedure done, I’d love to hear any tips you have for recovery.

 

*I needed to know that he was really behind this and not just going along with it because he thought I wanted it. So I tried to trick him and tell him I’d decided to go ahead and have breast surgery as well to which he quickly replied “nope”.

***See 2 week post surgery here***